Great. Weight.

I've been hiking a lot lately, up in Forest Park, as I usually do when the weather is congenial.  Recently, the bottom of my left foot has been a bit sensitive, uncomfortable standing without a shoe on or without some other padding.  So I've been online, self-diagnosing.  Of course I have.  I've decided that it's probably a mild case of metatarsalgia or good old plantar fasciitis.  (I think I've dealt with the latter before - but the other foot? - which gradually went away.)

Explaining plantar fasciitis, that cheeky Wikipedia was coldly insensitive enough to say, "among non-athletic populations, it is associated with a high body mass index."  "High body mass"?  I do believe that that's just another way of saying that I'm too heavy for my own feet.  Which I believe is another way of telling me that I'm just too fat.  Thank you so much, Wikipedia, for informing me that I'm collapsing under my own weight.

[hysterical sobbing]